Inside the Mind of a Violinist

I promised Cate that I would update!

2009-11-20T16:17:11Z

Well, as I like to keep my promises, I am updating my LJ for the first time in a very loooong time.

I am swamped with work this semester. Most people don't understand how horrible my workload is - as they have never tried to do what I am doing. In the next week alone, I have enough work to make an entire semester a nightmare to most normal human beings.

As a result, there is no sleep.

There is no light.

I've become as pale as a vampire!!! Is that good, or is it bad?

Anyway - that being said, I am also immensely enjoying myself.

I like my roommate (despite that she is extremely quiet and reserved, which means we're kinda... not BFF's, but I can deal with that).

My lab partner and I are getting along very well still. Which, is hilarious because I usually can't get along with anyone for this long.

I love getting to see my boyfriend at least once a week <3

I get to see the people I work with, and I'm not stuck at the Lowes from hell this year.

Negatives:

I have no time for friends.

I know I'm being a bad friend by even saying this, but I just want everyone to know that I'm not doing it intentionally. It really is THAT hard to juggle everything.

Furthermore, I have horrible family problems at the moment.

My Grandma is dying and I'm not there to you know, help my mom and whatnot.

As a result, nothing is getting done on my house (for those of you don't know - catastrophe struck my house, and bad things happened this summer).

Also, every moment of my weekend not devoted to working is devoted to my family as a result.

I have had zero downtime.

This makes for a cranky Gen, especially when all I hear is whining about how hard the real world is from other people who either work all the time, haven't reached the same level of schooling as me, or even my teachers.

I love you guys (and this isn't directed at anyone who is reading probably), but get a life. Realize that you're not the only person going through it.

That being said, I can def relate to Cate saying she has a double life - I'm DEF feeling that right now especially! With everything going on at home, and hospice now being at my house all the time, and me having to do more for my family, AND my week being split to 3 days Albany and 4 days New Paltz - I am DEFINITELY a split personality. I don't know which Genevieve I hope will one day be victorious though... is that bad?

Anyway - That's all for now. Talk to you all soon (I hope).

I just wanna say

2009-05-10T15:47:19Z

A quick congrats to all of my friends who have now graduated and taken the next step into the big world!!

I'm so proud of ya'll, and I really wish you all the best (be it with grad school, the job hunt, etc).

I vote this summer we all try to get together before everyone goes off and does their thing (or when they start doing their thing if we're talking jobbies). I miss ya'll!!

<3

Twilight

2009-01-16T00:11:28Z

Finally got to do some reading over break.

I just devoured the Twilight books.

All I can say is...

Wow. I'm in love.

Anyone else love them as much as I did? It seems most of the people I have talked to haven't liked them, or read them!! I'm kind of disappointed.

I'll reflect on 2008 like Dan!

2008-12-13T03:43:27Z

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Left UAlbany, and went away from home to a new school! Also, spending the summer without being in a show or doing a pit orchestra was definitely a first.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolution, and will you make more for next year?
I don't remember it, so I know I didn't keep it.

3a. Did anyone close to you get engaged/married?
I went to Zeus and Jennie's wedding with Dan!! That was awesome. Everyone and their brother got engaged this year though hahaahaha

3b. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Two of my cousins did!! Alley was born and so was Jayden.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, I'm still waiting for that event this year.

5. What countries did you visit?
None. I'm pretty lame.. I vote we go out of country next year, Dan!

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
An internship for the summer that I REALLY want that will show me what I want to do with life.
All of my grad school applications in the mail,
A better year musically.

7. What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

August 1st: My first apartment lease is signed.
September 16th: Two-Year with Daniellllll

There are more but I'm lazy

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finishing my 3 portion of the 3+2, and also figuring out a way to finish up all three degrees.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Probably my jury.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
just my tendonitis.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Probably my laptop.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Every single one of my friends who graduated, or applied to grad schools. You're all amazing.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
KK and Brett Wery. Enough said.

14. Where did most of your money go?
rent and gas

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going away to school

16. What songs will always remind you of 2008?
That's a tough one. Probably "I'm a Part of That" From Last 5 Years

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Older or wiser?
both
Thinner or fatter?
fatter
Richer or poorer?
evens out I think

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
practicing, sleeping, getting out more while in college :)

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
studying LOL

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Waiting for it... hopefully some of it with my love :-*

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I did in late 2006 and things haven't changed <- I love you so much.

23. How many one-night stands?
Only 12837912873.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Ugly Betty, Greek, Secret Life, Eli Stone

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I'm gonna say no... I don't think so.

26. What was the best book you read?
My nanotech books. yummmm

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
That I need to practice more. And expand my rep to things that I don't want to play. Also, that I LOVE Chamber music more than life itself.

28. What did you want and get?
A lot.

29. What did you want and not get?
The opportunity to live the college life.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Mama Mia!!!!! hahahahahaa

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Turned 21, went out with my friends !!!

32. What was one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Being able to spend more time with my friends before they leave. AND with dan!

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
I think I went more professional

34. What kept you sane?
Dan, Music, my new friends at NP when I was there... my mentor, and Judy!

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
GOOD QUESTION <.< >.>

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The election really bothered me this year. I consider it an issue lol. Every issue bothered me.

37. Who did you miss? (in no particular order)
Dan, All my friends at UAlbany, my home friends

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Jeremy!! And from NP - Mike Otis. He is an AMAZING man.

So...

2008-11-18T13:36:56Z

How many people are TOTALLY over the whole school thing???

I just wanna start grad school... like... now. hahahaha

A note to everyone about the Election

2008-10-03T21:44:56Z

Not saying this to be mean, but if you're a democrat, please do not message me just to try and argue with a Republican.

I'm getting really annoyed with all of the anti Republican party nonsense. I've been trying to control my rants about Obama and whatnot for several months now, and the McCain/ Palin arguing is starting to get to me.

No Politics - Okay? That's all I ask if you're talking to me! I literally had 5 people try to start with me last night, soooo... don't do it.

Maybe I should go into hibernation until after the election... hahaha

gracefulviolin @ 2008-09-26T13:12:00

2008-09-26T17:13:11Z

I feel a little less stressed now. But my mind is flooded with so many different emotions that I don't know what to do with them all. I'll figure it out though... I hope.

It's RAINING!!! My town is going to flood... so someone should come save me with a row boat!!! hahaha

And the Work Piles up

2008-09-24T19:27:47Z

I really think I have 3 weeks of work, and the pile just keeps getting bigger and bigger... I don't know what to do.

How am I gonna get all of my final projects done with the amount of homework they're giving me?

Hmm. Time management, help me!!!

Internet Secured

2008-09-15T12:27:53Z

So, now I finally have internet!! Exciting right? Needless to say, I can finally post replies and whatnot to you people now.

School is going well... There's a lot of work involved in the classes I'm taking, and I'm slightly annoyed by that. But, you know, I don't think that's necessarily a horrible thing. I just feel overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I'm doing.

I joined SWE. That's cool. We're going to take a few trips, and they're gonna help me network with people so I can get jobs. YAY!!!

Do I even need jobs? What about Grad school?

What am I doing?

Hmmm.

Hooray Update!

2008-08-30T14:20:01Z

So, I haven't been able to get online and do... anything in the past week. Internet and cable in the apartment haven't been installed as of yet, and the internet we are stealing cuts me off every time I try to do something remotely like posting or whatnot... Greattttt. Only one more week of that nonsense before I can live like a normal human being once again.

So, this week has been exciting!!! I really DO like it in New Paltz, but there is nothing to REALLY do there. That's probably good, considering the amount of homework I'm going to have...

They completely changed my class schedule around because they've accepted all of my credits now, so now I am taking:

1) Circuit Analysis
2) Circuit Lab
3) Digital Logic
4) Chem 1
5) Chem 1 Lab
6) Technical Communications
7) Signals and Systems
8) Electronics Laboratory

Also I will be taking one class at Albany:

1) Performance 3

Also, I will be joining one club:

1) Society of Women Engineers

Also, I will be working two jobs:

1) Lowes
2) Office Assistant to Judy at the Engineering Department :)

Sooo it looks like I'm pretty busy... but am I? I don't know it doesn't feel like it yet... I don't know.

Also, I'm feeling things that I shouldn't feel. That's interesting. It's so weird to be somewhere else, when all you want is to take the amazing college you're attending, and just drop it in Albany near... yeah. :(

But overall, I'd say I couldn't be happier?

Hmm

gracefulviolin @ 2008-08-18T11:31:00

2008-08-18T15:33:40Z

So, I moved in to my new apartment this weekend. It's really nice, and I'm satisfied. I'm still in Albany for a few days though, particularly because I wanted to see all of my UAlbany friends before it was too late to.

A lot of things are still up in the air, which I don't like, but I'm pretty sure no matter what, I'll make it through it. I'm really stubborn, and I don't like to give up.

I just hope everything works out the way I want it to.

I'll post pics of my apartment on facebook when I get a chance, so check them out in the early part of next week!

The only thing I have to say is...

2008-07-04T15:11:36Z

I hate it when you see your life falling into pieces around you, and you can't do anything but watch it happen.

Stolen from Cate

2008-06-05T11:39:54Z

What Gilmore Girls character are you? Your Result: Rory You are bright, smart, and fun to be around. You can be shy sometimes, but when you're with friends or you're upset, they see a whole different side of you.
Lorelai
Christopher
Luke
Sookie
Lane
What Gilmore Girls character are you?

Okay - Done with everything and decision made.

2008-05-16T11:50:11Z

Finals Done.

Projects Done.

The only thing left is playing at graduation.

I'm kind of sad.. But I'm excited for next year, at New Paltz!!

Also... I haven't gone to the doctor yet. Thanks for all the responses to my illness! I've taken all of them into consideration. My cousins have all been really beating me up recently because they think it's my gallbladder and they don't want me to get really sick like Rachel, and have to be in pain for like, a week before they can take it out.

I'm really going to miss this school. But I'm so excited to start things off new at my new school. I've got big plans for this one.

I hate finals

2008-05-13T20:45:07Z

I really hate finals.

Pain - Don't read if you can't tolerate it

2008-05-10T09:52:13Z

I'm going to have to use this as a record of when this happens, and I can actually stay okay enough to write about it.

I'm not entirely sure what's wrong with me, I only know that this is getting increasingly worse as time progresses. This happened to me once earlier in the semester, and I swear I thought I was dying. This is almost indefinitely worse than it was before though.

Middle of the stomach area, right below the ribcage. It feels like there's a little ball of fire sitting right there, and it's travelling up my throat, but the source stays in that spot, as if to support an unequal distribution of pain. Ribcage feels like it's hitting it and it feels like my esophagus itself is burning from whatever's travelling up it.

This pain has not made me pass out yet, though it has in the past (I feel face first onto my bedroom floor last year, thus those black and blue marks that are in my phone - ask me sometime and I'll post them), and did in the last occurrance of it, where I spent 6 hours sitting in the bathroom curled in a ball on the floor, shaking and intermittenly throwing up whenever I needed to, which also burned, like my stomach did.

Right now, I'm currently in the ball stage of my cycle, just chilling in my bathroom proofreading really well, because my hands are shaking really badly. I'm hoping to stop it before it gets to one of the more extreme levels, because I don't want to throw up/ don't like to pass out, but I have NO IDEA what this is.

If you guys have any ideas, let me know what you think it is - especially if you've felt these symptoms before. This is a really horrible time of year for this to happen to me, as I have four finals on Wednesday, so anything I can do to prevent said attacks/ whatever from occurring until after then, when I can possibly seek medical treatment, would be fantastic.

I just need to write this down because last time it happened, when I woke up I couldn't explain it afterward and nobody could figure out what it was. I have my ideas behind it, but I am PRAYING that I am wrong.

I LOVE

2008-05-07T02:01:22Z

The Phantom of the Opera

I forgot how much I loved it until tonight.

I also love Adam and MaryJane. Because they rock hardcore.

And... I'm becoming an emo physics student. That is all.

Okay guys

2008-05-04T04:28:14Z

The answer is...

I put my deposit in....

to both.

Yeah, I know. I'm crazy, but now I'll just put a pro and con list up to make you guys see how confused I really AM.

The Pros of New Paltz:
Small School
Nice Town
1 Hour from Home
Aprox 1 Hour train ride from NYC
The Dept Chair was nice
Professors seem nice
Enthuastic about having me
100% Job placement (Most of them work for IBM after grad)
Lots of research opportunities
Could potentially still take lessons from Hilary

Pros of Bing:
Bigger Town
Nice populated area with mall and such
Several people I know including my AG.
People from my college are going there
Sequence requires I only take like, 11 classes.
People seem nice including dept head
Really nice and good music department
More people at the school

Cons of New Paltz:
NO HOUSING - I would have to get an apartment with other transfers
That means I'd be responsible for an apartment, and food and whatnot.
Nobody I know there except maybe one girl
Would be like my first three years at college, minus my parents but still commuting.
New Paltz is in the middle of two ghetto towns.
New Paltz also has like nothing in it. They have a shoprite? haha
More in gas would prob be used to get to places, like school and work.
The Music Department hates me already and I haven't even gotten there.

Cons of Bing:
2 hours away :(
The drive there is entirely cow country and kind of awful
It would be an awful drive home in winter.
My parents wouldn't be able to get down there if I needed them
The outer town and surrounding houses look like slums.
The engineering building itself is kind of gloomy.
The staircases look like dungeon stairs in the engineering building.
Not as good of a job placement. NP told me specific companies, and Bing was very vague in the companies that hire, but said they did have good job placement.
The courses themselves look like they might be harder at Bing
Lessons and such are up in the air til fall?

I don't know what I want. They're two really big extremes. And they both have things I want and that I don't want.

Also, I'm REALLY gonna miss albany. Why is it that I'm FINALLY happy here when I'm about to leave??? I don't get how that works. I finally made some amazing friends, and now I have to leave them and make new ones. It took me three years to find these guys :( Also, the professors like me now, and the music department is sad to see me go too. I'm just a mess I'm gonna like, cry at every final.

SIGH.

Okay...

2008-04-26T20:41:00Z

Put in my deposit.

But to where?

Good question. And the answer is...

I will tell you in a week!!! Haha.

Okay...

2008-04-24T18:16:19Z

So I think...

I want to go to Binghamton

Or New Paltz.

What do you guys think of these schools? I need some opinions, I can't make the choice... It's too hard.

Another Update

2008-04-14T21:08:46Z

Accepted:
New Paltz
Binghamton
Clarkson

Haven't Heard From:
RPI

It just figures the school I want to go to most hasn't gotten back to me yet.

Deposits Due:

May 1st - All three other colleges

Ummmmm.... RPI. Hurry your ass up.

Update

2008-04-11T01:23:49Z

Less stressed out over getting in.

Accepted:
Binghamton
New Paltz

Waiting for a Decision:
Clarkson - They looked at me today. I will have my letter by Monday/ Tuesday.
RPI - My application will be reviewed shortly. Idk when, and idk how. I sent them midterm grades though, because my teachers gave me good ones so I could get in.

Visited:
New Paltz - It was really nice there. Except the bitch in the Music Department. But it's gorgeous there, and the labs are amazing.

I don't know what to do.

gracefulviolin @ 2008-04-07T22:57:00

2008-04-08T02:59:06Z

Binghamton - idk what the hell is taking them so long

Clarkson - Wants my midterm grades to make a decision on admission. Is that normal?

RPI - My application is complete and will be reviewed shortly. HMM

I hope they make up their minds soon. If I decide to go to New Paltz, I have to put a deposit down by May 1st. UGHHHHHHHHH

I am stressed

I need to practice.

gracefulviolin @ 2008-03-28T12:41:00

2008-03-28T16:42:40Z

I got into New Paltz!

1 down 3 to go (Hopefully)

Also, I went to Rochester, and I really like it there. Also, I enjoyed muchly spending time with Cate and Michelle <3

And of course my wonderful boyfriend :)

That is all

I feel like sharing

2008-03-16T12:12:40Z

Those of you who like to make late night trips to Denny's, do NOT bring me with you.

I have been up since 3 in the morning dying from it, and I will NOT, repeat NOT eat there ever again. No more Denny's. Don't even invite me.

That is all :)

Oh wait, I lied. Becky, I have been reading this gaming magazine in between getting sick, and apparently there are a massive amount of FF games in it and I was reminded of you. How many of the new ones have you played while in Japan? Just wondering. :)(New Old ones I should say, I THINK they're all rereleases)